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Susie's Diary Susie has been diagnosed with FIP
(Dry form). This diary notes her progress and shares pics of her :) |
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December 9th She woke me up this morning
at around 8am, and i cuddled her. She went to the toilet by herself, and
managed it ok, although had a little trouble balancing as she turned around.
I fed her and she had about half a tin of a/d, she did really well. She then
went to sit by the radiator, and was there for the next few hours. Later she got up and walked
about - very unsteady, with the occasional stumble, and we had to take her
out of the living room because her back legs were sliding so much on the
laminate floor. She wandered in the
conservatory, and it was obvious her eye sight or her judgment were not up to
speed. She also walked into a step, hitting her nose. Since then she has been in
the bedroom - she had a little accident on the bed - which amazes me as she
has not been drinking water as much. I moved her off the bed so we could
clean the duvet and she cried out when I picked her up. I put her back on the bed
and since then she's been very quiet. Breathing noisily, but not very
responsive. I don't want her sight and
balance to get worse, so tomorrow I am going to let her go. There has been no
improvement over the weekend, and her Respiratory infection isnt clearing up
(making sleep half impossible for her). This will get steadily worse, and I
can't let her go through it. Now it's hit her nervous system, it means our
attempts to suppress it didn't work. Even though the lymph node which at
first was the only infected area, shrunk by a quarter, this disease still
managed to spread through her body, and even effect her brain. This is
tearing me apart, but looking at her now, she isn't happy. I hope she will understand,
and I hope, so much, that there really is a rainbow bridge. I am not a
religious person - over the last few years I've taken quite an atheist
attitude - but I am going to hold on to the possibility, however remote I
might think it is, that Susie will go someplace else - someplace where Mitzi
and Cleo will look after her, and play with her so she's not lonely. |
December 9th Continued. December 10th Susie's beathing sounded difficult in the night - not just congested, but I think she was having real trouble. This morning I fed her and it took alot of coaxing - she managed half a tin of a/d in the end. She sort of leaned ehr face to one side as she ate, and I cleaned her up afterwards. She managd to go to the toielt by herself, and then walked out into the kitchen. She fell down as she walked, and I helped her to her favourite spot. I took her to the vet for 11am. I showed her some of the buildings I like on the way down, and she also reacted to the sound of the children playing as we passed a school. I kissed her and told her I loved her. The vet said she couldn't see very well. I kissed her a few more times, and spoke to her quietly. He laid her on a nice warm blanket and gave her an injection. She cried a bit and it scared me. I was scared she didn't want to go, or that it hurt her. It was very quick. I'm having her buried in a pet cemetary so I will be able to go to the burial and visit her. I'm devastated. It hurts so much that my baby is gone. I love ehr - I would have done anything if there could have been a cure. I really thought we could beat this thing - but it got to her nervous system and her brain was effected. Susie, I love you so much. I don't know how i'll ever feel whole again. |
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August 10th 2003
I know that
when there is more than one cat in the household, and one has been diagnosed
with FIP, that we all worry about the possibility of the disease affecting
the other cats. The question of whether to separate cats is also a big one. So I thought
that it would be important to update the diary with news of Betsy's health.
It is a year and a half exactly, since Susie died, and while she was ill I
made no attempt to isolate her from Betsy. They'd always washed each other's
faces, and shared a litter tray etc, so it seemed an unnecessary action. As
the two of them were very close, it may have caused them both stress to be
kept apart, and so I didn't restrict their access to each other at all. Well, a year
and a half on, and Betsy is in perfect health. She had an FIP test recently,
and her titre was 10. My vet has said that a titre of between 1 and 10, means
that the disease is eliminated - it cannot develop into FIP, and the corona
virus cannot be passed on to other cats. So
I am very happy that Betsy is in good health, and for that I am very grateful.
I have been giving thought to
bringing a new kitten into our home, and came very close a couple of months
ago, but unforunatly, the cat shelter found that she had a titre of 100, and
as Betsy has such a low titre she is vulnerable to infection from a cat with
such a high titre. Realistically, as she has all but eliminated the corona
virus, and it didn't develop into FIP at all, then she might be perfectly
well around a cat with a high titre. It's rare for the corona virus to
develop into FIP - but it's simply a risk I cannot take with Betsy. If only I could turn back
time, and have my Susie back with us again. I remember so clearly, all the
things she would do, how she and Betsy would play together, and how she
waited for me at the window to come home from work. Even from half way down the
street, I could see her at the window, and she wouldn't see me until I got up
closer (I think the air gun injury to her eye made her a little short
sighted), and then she would suddenly see me, and jump off the windowsill,
running to the door to meet me. I miss that. I miss her,
and always will. She is buried in a pet cemetery, and has a nice headstone,
which has a vase, so I can give the flowers that I bring some water. I am
going to plant lots of flowers there for her - It would be nice if there was
always something in bloom throughout the year. She is in a
peaceful country cemetery, surrounded by fields and trees, and, most importantly,
she is surrounded so many other pets, whose humans have loved them, and cared
for them. She is surrounded by peace and love. |
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